How do you normally approach the holidays? Do prepare yourself to grin and bear all the things you think you're supposed to do? Do you go to places you'd rather not, or stay longer than you enjoy, because someone in your family has decided it's required? If you'd like to enjoy the holidays more, next time play a game of Nurture You Monopoly. The rules are: whatever arrangements your family has made, pre-plan a time and place to do something you really enjoy. Would that be a massage, pedicure, coffee with friends, a walk up the mountains or along the beach? Or something else? Then devise an exit. Ask a friend to call you with an excuse. Pre-arrange a taxi to come and pick you up. When the phone call or taxi arrives, say: “Thank you so much for today! I just have to pop out now to help my friend. I'll be back to enjoy it even more a bit later!” Then smile, LEAVE and nurture you.
*** This is one of My Favourite Holiday Game Qs, which I will re-publish whenever we're approaching the holidays. What if even just remembering this ONE Q helped you create the festive season you'd truly enjoy?
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When you meet people for the first time, what do you tell them about you? Do you have a set patter about who you are, what you do, what your title or business is, what the main challenges of your life are, and who else is in your life? Do you enjoy these conversations? Are they spontaneous and fun? Or are they boring and predictable? Do you find people really listen to them? Or do most people simply wait for a pause in your story to launch their own? How well do you listen to theirs? And how much of telling and retelling your story cements it into place? With each retelling, does it become easier for you to create the changes you'd like, or harder? If you'd like something different, ask “What if my life had no story?” What if you woke up every morning like Drew Barrymore in the movie 50 First Dates, with a totally fresh start? Like to play? Then for the next month, whenever you meet someone new, first asking them questions until they ask about you. Only then tell them something you have never said before, even if it's not yet true. Create your story.
Are you about to enter a holiday season? How much stress do you normally experience when you spend time with your family or in-laws? Have you got relatives who give you a hard time? Maybe you married the favourite cousin and you're “not good enough”? Or do you have the plain mean ones who know you're an easy mark? If you dread family gatherings because you know someone is out to get you, trying to control you, or just not fun to hang out with, try these games and create a difference. Are your get togethers full of fighting? How many fights are really just individuals crying out for more attention? So give the ones giving you the hardest time, the attention they seek. With gentleness and allowance say “I'm so grateful that you are in my life. You are such a gift.” Then ask them questions and listen. No one will have paid them so much genuine attention in a long time. Being totally open, vulnerable and present with them will knock them over like a house of cards.
*** This is one of My Favourite Holiday Game Qs, which I will re-publish whenever we're approaching the holidays. What if even just remembering this ONE Q helped you create the festive season you'd truly enjoy? |
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