How well do people read what's in your mind and heart? Are you frustrated that no one gets you? Not even (or especially!) your mum or insignificant other? How much attention do people pay to you and to what you say (out loud, let alone notice what's buried deeper down)? Or do they usually focus on what they have decided you should be or do, “for your own good”? And how willing are you to tell others what you require or desire? A lot, a little, or not at all? When did you decide that you couldn't ask for things for you? How many people have told you that choosing for you is selfish (so just do what they tell you, for them...)? What if by choosing for you and creating the life you'd truly like, you contributed more to others than you ever imagined possible? Find out by asking “What am I unwilling to ask for, that if I did ask for it would contribute to creating the life I'd truly like?”
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What does success mean to you? Getting into THAT school? Getting THAT job? THAT person? THAT house? Driving a cool sports car? Having a million dollars in the bank? Nothing wrong with having a clear idea about what would be fun for you. The question is, did you select these things because they would be fun for you? Or because you decided (or someone else told you) that these things would show other people you were successful? And until you have these thing, you must work long and hard, and make sacrifices, including not doing some things you really enjoy? If you're not enjoying life right now, ask “How have I defined success?” and get clear on what is driving you. Then you can start driving yourself and define success in a way that works for you. For example, “What will it take for me to bounce out of bed very morning, smiling and inspired by everything I do and everyone I meet? And maybe with some fun zappy wheels to get me around...or something greater?”
Do you like helping people? Is is important to you? What is it about helping people you enjoy? Do you feel worthy? Does it make you feel valued and valuable? What don't you enjoy? Are you frustrated when you give your best to someone but they don't seem to want it or appreciate it? Do you find that no matter how much you help people, some simply never seem to change? There is nothing wrong with wanting to help people. It's awesome. Empowering people to know they can change anything in their lives is a gift. Just know that even when you do your best, people will choose what they choose, and it's got nothing to do with you. People choose what they do because somewhere, somehow they like it. If you'd like to get clear about why and how you can help people with greater ease ask “What's the value of helping people?”
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