Do you find you do a lot of stuff for others that you'd really rather not? Other people will ALWAYS try to get you to do stuff for them, using obligation and guilt to control you. What if you started by doing stuff for YOU first? Start by choosing things that feel light to you and that you know will contribute to your life and living. Then when you want to say 'no' to others, smile and pull the energy of joy and say: "Thank you SO much for thinking of me! I'm soooo sorry. That doesn't work for me right now". Then change the subject.
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Here are some more not-technically-a-question magic words. Use them to disappear everything from the drag down, knock out fights to the niggly differences of opinions. You're not saying they're right or wrong. You're acknowledging their right to have their own (perhaps insane) point of view, that you have yours too, and let's get on with the fun of life. Say it with joy & energy and then distract 'WOW, that's a REALLY interesting point of view....what would be fun for us to do now?''...little kids are SO easy to distract...
When you're in a deadlock with someone, would you like to have the stickiness fall away, and open doors to new possibilities with ease and speed? If so, first acknowledge the other person's point of view by saying “You're right, I'm wrong” three times. Then ask “What can I do to make up for the damage I've done?” Check your energy matches the words. Asking sarcastically or angrily doesn't work so much. The magic is in the energy. When you let go of your fixed points of view about being right, the flood gates holding back a tidal wave of possibilities will open and you may discover something you could have never imagined. At the very least, the deadlock will disappear.
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