Has anyone ever been angry with you to try and distract you from seeing what was true, either so you wouldn't see it, or so they didn't have to look at it? For example, when you questioned someone because you sensed they were lying, did they get angry or indignant, and say things like “I can't believe you are questioning me!” Did that make you angry? Do you get angry when people say things about you that aren't true? One useful thing to know about anger is that it can be an indicate a lie. So next time you feel anger rising, ask yourself “Is there a lie spoken or unspoken here?” You will know. If you'd like more clarity, stop and ask the other person “What do you mean by that?” Then listen. Asking questions in the face of anger will move you from the auto-response of reaction, to the freedom of action so you can create a situation that you'd really prefer.
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