What in your life is consistently "going wrong"? Have you asked someone to deliver something to you each week after a particular time, but they always turn up three hours early when you're not there? Are your point of sale records and till drawer always slightly out? Are your fuses always blowing? Are staff often turning up late, or not at all? How do you react? By sigh and patching things up to get by? Do you stress and scream? Do do you ignore it? Or are you in a constant state of slight irritation? If you'd like to disappear such "goings wrong"and create greater ease in your business, ask "What about this requires my attention?" And then attend to whatever shows up.
Do you find most people in your life love to tell you what to do? Perhaps you've started a new business, project, or hobby, and suddenly friends, family and strangers start telling you what you're doing wrong and how you should be doing it? Had you expected at least friends and family to be supportive and offer kind words? Have you been caught in a whirl of accommodating armchair critics only to become exhausted or confused? Or do you respond by rejecting everything, saying to yourself that their ideas are off target, won't work, or are too costly? Is this fun for you? If not, ask "What if I could receive everything with ease?" and smile and nod every time someone gifts you their views. Would you be willing to step out of the autopilot "do" or "do not" and acknowledged with gratitude every unsolicited point of view as gifts that could contribute to your awareness? Then you can choose to act, or not, from your expanded awareness. Repeat ad infinitum.
What in your life right now has slapped you on the face? Is something going on that has apparently come out of no where and bitten you on the bum? Like your bank transferring thousands of your money to someone you didn't authorise them to, and then refusing to refund your money? Or something even more inconvenient? Whatever that is for you, when you find you're trapped in an "OMG this is terrible" cycle of stress and worry ask "What's right about this that I'm not getting?" And keep asking it over and over, even if you don't believe it or feel it. What if there was ALWAYS something right about a "bad" situation? Like finding a bank that was even cheaper and offered much better service? How does it get any better?
When you meet people for the first time, what do you tell them about you? Do you have a set patter about who you are, what you do, what your title or business is, what the main challenges of your life are, and who else is in your life? Do you enjoy these conversations? Are they spontaneous and fun? Or are they boring and predictable? Do you find people really listen to them? Or do most people simply wait for a pause in your story to launch their own? How well do you listen to theirs? And how much of telling and retelling your story cements it into place? With each retelling, does it become easier for you to create the changes you'd like, or harder? If you'd like something different, ask “What if my life had no story?” What if you woke up every morning like Drew Barrymore in the movie 50 First Dates, with a totally fresh start? Like to play? Then for the next month, whenever you meet someone new, first asking them questions until they ask about you. Only then tell them something you have never said before, even if it's not yet true. Are you willing to create your life story the way you'd really like it?
When you ask questions to create the changes you'd like, how often do you focus them on changing a situation with someone, or something else? For example, you don't enjoy working in your family business, but you do it to keep the incoming money in the family. So you start asking questions like “What will it take for the business to attract a plentiful supply of customers?” or “What will it take for the other family members to do their jobs even better?” assuming that if you can generate more customers and greater efficiency for the business, it can and will hire someone else to do your job. You may create that outcome. Or you may create something completely different, including one which requires you to be even more involved. So if you'd like to make sure the changes you're asking for are aimed directly at the outcome you'd like for you, ask “Where am I in this?” In this case, you could ask “What will it take for the business to thrive and no longer require my labour, or something greater than I can imagine?
Do you consider change to be hard? You know you're not entirely (or at all) satisfied with your work, business, relationships, health, body or life in general, and you have an idea about what you'd prefer, and yet you can't seem to make it happen? Do you hear yourself saying “I'd like to do this, but I can't because...”? How many reasons and justifications do you have as to why your current situation, although not ideal, is easier to have than making waves and changing anything? What if change wasn't the hard part? If you'd like to find out what might open a door to greater possibilities, ask “Am I willing to acknowledge what I've chosen?” What if the hard part was acknowledging that everything you have created as your life until now had been your choice? There is no need to make it significant. Simply notice it and acknowledge that you are a magnificent creator. Now what do you choose to create? The same, or different?
Do you strive for completion? Do you value having goals and focus your energy on achieving those? How do you feel when either you reach, or don't reach your goal? Does procrastination worry you along the way? Is the process fun? If striving for completion does not give you the sense of fulfillment and satisfaction you were hoping for, and procrastination distracts you, ask “Having done this, what can I create from here?” What if nothing was ever a completion? What if you considered your work, business and your life in general an ongoing creation, of which you were fully present and created elegantly and joyfully? Elegance is the greatest result with the least effort. You create elegance when you are fully present and choose consciously and continuously. And procrastination? This often occurs when you consider something a necessity. What if it were all just choice?
Today is the official opening of my latest project - Polit Bar - so this is a GREAT question for
Have you recently made a career change? Did you realise your job wasn't working for you and quit? Perhaps you had a more rewarding offer and moved on? Or did controversy force you to change ? Are you at ease with the change, or conflicted? Are you enjoying your new life completely? Or do you miss elements of your former career and remain energetically connected? Are you struggling to know who you are without your former identity? Do you think that change means you need to leave everything about the former you behind? Even if you were forced to leave your career defamed and vilified, regardless of the amazing contribution you had made, what if you didn't need to cut it off and make it wrong? If you'd like greater ease with your changes, ask “What can I use this as a springboard for, to create something even greater?” What if you considered your career change a gift that created the space for even more of you to show up?
Are you distracted by competition? Focused on how to out-smart, out-do, out-strip someone else in your field? Perhaps someone is selling an idea they stole from you as theirs and you're trying to figure out how to beat them? Do you consider that someone else will always be greater than you and at least you should strive to be more like them? How expansive does competition with someone else feel? When you enter into competition with someone – even if they are the “leader” in your field – does this create the space for you to be as great as you are? Or does it keep you locked into the limitations of whatever they're willing to, or telling you to create? Can you truly compete with anyone else? No. How can an apple compete with a nightingale? If you'd like to step into your life and out of the limited band of competition with others, ask “How can I out-create me, beyond what exists and anything anyone has considered before?” Are you willing to expand and create your life beyond what others can imagine? It might be a whole lot more fun too.
Do you spend a lot of your time feeling wrong? Do friends, family, and even passing strangers seem compelled to tell you that you haven't got it quite (or a lot) right, and if you just did it their way your life would be a whole lot better? Do you agree with, or fight against them? Is that fun and does it make you smile? If not and you'd prefer more joy, ask “Am I willing to step into my life?” What if you weren't trapped in the narrow band of other people's possibilities? What's the narrow band? Where you either agree and align and do what they tell you, or resist and react and do the opposite. When you expand beyond this band of polarity and create your life from what you know works for you, you have infinite possibilities. When people tell you you're wrong, smile and say “You're right. Thank you so much! You really have helped me to step into my life.” Then change the subject or walk away, “returning to sender” any lingering feeling of wrongness, and do what you know works for you.
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