Before you call the police on this one, let me ask you: where is your comfort zone? Is it on the stage? On the couch? How many of these are outside your zone: singing loudly in public, singing in public, singing loudly, singing, speaking in front of more than three people, telling a joke? What else? What activity makes your heart pound, your hands go clammy and you to think “ooooh nooooo not that....!” How much does having a comfort zone help you to create the life you'd really like? A lot, a little, or not at all? How much time do you spend thinking about the things you won't do, avoiding situations you think might lead you out of your safety zone? And how much fun are missing out on? If you'd like a peak at the possibilities that lie beyond, ask “What if I played with my comfort zone?” and take a nudging step. What's the worst that can happen? People might laugh. And laughing is good, right? So what if you joined in?
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Do you encounter many angry people in your life? When people do anger, are they ever really interested in hearing your point of view? Or is their main focus getting a reaction out of you? Are they interested in you being free to say and do what you prefer? Or are they looking to control you? You know exact the moment your buttons are pushed and you become trapped in emotional reaction. Would you like to be free of that auto-response? If so, next time someone does anger at you, be Cute Not Bright. Stop and ask them “OK, what do you mean by that?” and listen. Keep asking this and listen until their anger has dissipated. Anger is a distractor people will use against you to see how you'll react, so they can find a way to gain control over you. Acknowledging the other person like this will take you out of simply reacting to them, and into action for you so you can create the life as you'd really like it.
Is your priority in life to help people? What do you like about helping people? Would you like to change the world? Do you know that, with your support, some people could create the change you'd like to see? You're not wrong. Has it always been easy for you to help people? Or do you find it a struggle, where time, money, and people always seem to thwart your efforts? Would you like to create the greatest change with the greatest ease? Then start here. Whenever you see possibilities in someone and feel the desire to help them, first ask “How can I help you?” Then listen. Be aware, some people do not desire change, no matter how great your offer. Others may like your help, but not to change; just to fill their need. This question will help you see exactly what people are looking for so you can create the greatest change possible.
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