What have you made the answer to your life? Relationship? “When I find The One I'll be happy.” Money? “When I have X money I'll be secure.” Property? “When I buy my own house I'll be a real man.” Work? “When I get that job I'll be successful.” Will these things in themselves make you feel happy, secure, real, successful? Or does your point of view make you feel happy, secure, real, successful? If you didn't have the point of view you lacked something, would you feel dissatisfied and unhappy? So when you're feeling less than or dissatisfied with your life as it is, and you hear yourself repeating “If I only had X, I'd be Y” ask “What am I making having X about?” Then notice what the real target of your desire is and ask “What will it take to be Y now?”